Tag: goals

Fighting the funk

From time to time every professional deals with it. Periods during which we go through the motions. We feel tired, emotionally drained and in some extreme cases sometimes unmotivated and unchallenged. Nonetheless, we put our heads down and press on. In some instances these feelings generally go away after some time, however during this period things can surely be stressful. I dub this feeling, "The Funk". The funk is really a mental state of being. There are many potential contributing factors that can put us in such a state and the focus of today’s blog is to help us to be more aware so that we can address them in an effective manner.

Have you ever worked with someone who is always bubbly? Every morning they have a smile on their face; they are chatty and are usually the one who brightens up the office. The one day that this individual walks into the office and is not their usual self, everyone takes notice. Why? Because for someone like that to be withdrawn, it often means that something is going on. If that one day turns into weeks or months there is a great cause for concern. The same can be said when the opposite occurs-- a typically withdrawn or reserved individual becomes very loud, curt and abrasive for no particular reason. Everyone takes notice! It is the change in behavior that is immediately apparent to everyone around such examples, but what about the reasons behind them?

In my book, How To Make It From The Classroom To The Cubicle, which was first published back in March 2013, I wrote a section entitled, “People are People”. This is something I also have addressed in blogs, but particularly during the training workshops that I conduct. The premise is that because we have lives and aspirations outside of the workplace it is very easy that these outside factors can affect our disposition when we do come into the workplace. It is impossible to keep the different aspects of our lives from intersecting because after all we are only human. Imagine that "bubbly" person mentioned above. They could have just gotten some bad news about their child or they could be in the middle of a family crisis. Imagine if it were you dealing with a situation like that, coming to work knowing that the moment you are through you have to return to the same set of circumstances at home? Imagine all of that with the added stress, pressure, politics and social interactions that are part of the workplace. It does not seem so simple when viewed from this perspective!

That said there are two different angles with which we can take when we fight the funk at the work. Our Approach: things we can do for ourselves and Management's Approach: things management can do on behalf of the employee.

Let's start with the employee's perspective. If you as an employee are dealing with a set of personal matters that are starting to encroach on your ability to function effectively at work then something has to be done. You need to speak up to ensure that someone understands the struggles that you are going through and if possible can facilitate some sort of relief. The bottom line is that at some point you may have to trust someone with personal details about your life. However, it does not mean that you should go babbling off your business to any ear that wants to listen. You should to be very strategic with whom you let know what is taking place in your life. A member of the human resources team or someone in management might be ideal candidates, as they can potentially offer you helpful options on behalf of the company. Be mindful that the passive approach: wait until someone notices you before you speak of your dilemma, could lead to more stress and anxiety because that help may never come. Trust me, others do notice, but many are afraid to get involved with other people's problems, primarily because they have problems and issues of their own.

From management’s perspective, they must pay careful attention to their employees and step in when things seem amiss to ensure that individuals are getting the right assistance as early as possible. Any good leader should be cognizant of the fact that at any given time, people who you are leading may be dealing with issues that stem from factors that are both internal and external to the workplace. That said, a leader should not wait until those times to 'pry' or try to build trust. It may be too late. A leader should encourage open dialogue and interaction that fosters trusting relationships between his or her staff members and him or herself. Hence, when matters do arise, there is some foundation of trust that the employee can hopefully feel comfortable enough to step on.

These two perspectives however can give the impression that only serious matters can affect your mindset at work. This is not true. If you are in the doldrums at work because you feel like you don't fit in, or feel like you don't belong, or feel like opportunities are passing you by, you too can affect change. I have often heard the sentiment from people that I encounter who feel like they are being overlooked at work and that it’s management's responsibility to take notice. While this is somewhat true, it is equally your responsibility to speak up and affect change. You cannot feel alienated on an assumption. It is far more effective to speak up and bring the matter to management's attention first before casting any judgment or resigning yourself to feelings of being cast aside.

Speaking up is not a license to become a complainer. It is simply exercising your right as an individual to express yourself. When that is done, you should lift your head and by extension your demeanor and give your best until things turn around. When management knows that you are unhappy about something and you still exhibit the right attitude, you stand out. When you have the opportunity to whine and complain, but instead you raise your concerns in a polite and direct manner, you stand out. When you stand out, you increase the chances of things changing for the better.

The main takeaway today is this: the funk is real. From time to time we are going to feel like we don't want to be at work and the reasons can be numerous. Recognizing those moments and effectively identifying and dealing with the factors that cause them can make a positive difference on your career. For things that are fixable your responsibility is to fix them. For things that are more complicated, HR and management can assist you in dealing with your situation. However, if after careful assessment you determine that the factors that affect you are a result of the work environment and after an honest effort they cannot be changed, then you should exercise your freedom of choice and explore other job options. Your career depends on it.

Until next time remember: as long as you have life you should live it to your fullest potential.

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Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful: Don't measure your success with that of others

Today marks the last edition of the series, Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful. It is entitled: Don't measure your success with that of others. In this installment we explore the perils of trying to measure ourselves using someone else's measuring stick. Based on the first blog in this series (link here) the goals that we set for ourselves on the quest for success must be personal-- which implies that the success that we are to discover must also be personal. The best way to explain this is the use of a sports analogy.

The journey to success is often likened unto a race, which conventional wisdom tells us there must be a winner. If that is the case, does it imply that in this 'race' toward success all of the other participants are destined for failure? Does it also mean that we all should give up once someone is officially declared the winner? I say not so! If you have ever witnessed a men's 100 meters dash at an Olympic athletics competition, you would see that when the race is over there is more than one person celebrating. Why is that? Well if you understand a fundamental dynamic of success then it will make sense. If coming in second place is the best that you can do, then you will be doing yourself a disservice by not being comfortable with that fact. You see, you will never be happy if all you do is keep comparing yourself to other people. I am not saying that they can't serve as a source of inspiration, but to have an obsessive compulsion in trying to match up or even outdo the competition in every aspect is very unhealthy. It is under such conditions that jealousy and greed are developed, which can result in cutting corners to make up the shortfall.

On the other hand, there are those of us who are working night and day trying to live up to some unrealistic expectation that may not likely come to fruition. And it’s not because you don't have the desire, but maybe it just was not meant to be. The best example is a parent-child relationship. A parent may have lofty aspirations for their child to become a doctor. What then happens to a child who wants to be a chef, but enrolls into medical school simply to please the parent? His/her parent’s desire is not going to compensate for the hardships they may endure. This is why setting your own goals is important. The ideal scenario is when a parent can help a child to set goals and then provide support in helping them to attain those goals.

Handling your success can be summarized into the common expression- be comfortable in your own skin. It doesn't mean that once you make your decision the process will then be easy. Please be warned that this could be quite the contrary. It means that once your planning is over, you enter this race with the understanding that there will be challenges and times of second guessing and even major frustrations. However, knowing that the dream that you are chasing after is all yours, gives you the inner strength to keep running and a greater sense of satisfaction when success does indeed come.

So what have we learnt from this discourse:

Setting goals is the most important step in being successful. After all, with no finish line how can you tell if you have made it. The goals must be challenging yet realistic. Don't bite off more than you can chew all at once. Break them up into smaller goals so that there is a continual sense of progress.

Once the goals are set the work begins. There will be obstacles, good days and bad, however you must believe in yourself! Trust in your ability and most importantly trust in your gut instinct.

Acting like you belong is a take on the old adage, think like where you are headed and not where you currently are. It is simple, yet revolutionary. It tells you that you cannot be bogged down by your perceived differences and or weaknesses. You either belong or you don't! It is your decision.

Focus, focus, focus - Do not take your eyes off of the finish line! Anything or anyone who is in your way needs to be removed.

Lastly you alone can determine what success is. Chasing after someone else's dream will only lead to a life of frustration.

If this series has been insightful please leave a comment or send me a message. If any questions may have arisen while reading this series, by all means send me questions and I promise I will answer them.

Until next time remember: as long as you have life you should live it to your fullest potential.

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Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful: Eliminating the noise

Today our journey continues with the fourth installment of the series, Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful: Eliminating the noise. We are almost to the end with only one more remaining. If you are joining this discourse and have not read the others that preceded, I recommend that you go back and read them once you have concluded reading today's offering. It is really important that you get the entire picture of what is being communicated in this series. Now let us begin with today’s message.

I submit to you that you that your ability to eliminate the noise has a direct bearing on the level of success that you can attain. It also impacts the timeline in which you can see this success. Distractions and a lack of discipline are lethal dream killers, which leave many individuals who once were loaded with potential, wondering what went wrong. Focus then, is a powerful and necessary character trait one must develop. To better understand focus, let us examine the image above of a racehorse.

As you may have noticed in the picture the horse is wearing blinders or blinkers. In general if you have ever carefully observed a horse race you would notice that most if not all the horses where blinkers. Have you ever wondered why? The answer is encapsulated in the very nature and anatomy of a horse's eye. It is said that the equine eye is the largest of any land mammal. It has the ability to see a staggering 350 degree range of monocular vision. However most of this vision is peripheral, which is relatively poor. As a result a horse is easily spooked when it is approached from its periphery and tends to rear on its hind legs or take flight as a defensive strategy.

I did some research to find out why race horse owners see it fit to put blinders on their horses and this is what I discovered:

Blinders help the race horse run in a straight line. Because of its vision a horse has the propensity to run in a diagonal line, so blinders reduce the peripheral vision and keeps the horse's focus down the track.

Blinders help the race horse from being spooked by the other horses in the race. Remember it is in the horse's nature to be alarmed by objects that are moving in its periphery, which means that a horse race is the perfect environment for a horse to become unsettled.

Blinders prevent immature horses from turning around and looking at its rider. Imagine how dangerous this can be for both horse and rider if this occurs at full speed in the middle of a race.

From these examples it is evident that blinders help a horse to keep focused, by keeping its eyes looking forward and reducing distractions at crucial moments. The same ideology is applicable to you. Are you so prone to distractions that you easily lose focus and begin placing your attention in other directions apart from your goals? Or are you easily spooked by competition? The moment you realize that there are others vying for the same position, same prize, same promotion and same job, you get scared and your instinctual reaction is to take flight? If this describes you today then you are in need of proverbial blinders. You need that ability to block out all of the distractions and noise that can take you off your course.

As I close, I challenge you to do some soul searching in order to identify all of the distractions that are preventing you from living out to you full potential. It is only after you have identified these distractions that you can create a plan to block them out. Remember what distracts you may not necessarily distract me, so this exercise requires a serious self-assessment. I guarantee you that eliminating the noise will make a world of difference as you continue on your quest to success.

Until next time remember: as long as you have life you should live it to your fullest potential.

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How often should I revisit/review my goals?

Welcome to this installment of The Weekly Wisdom blog, today's posting is a follow up from last week's entitled, Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful - having a vision. The response has been overwhelming and I thank you for your support. Why not tell a friend about this site? Share it on Facebook or Twitter and let us go on this journey of personal development together.

Of the responses from last week I got this message from Kwesi C: I enjoyed today's blog. Thanks for sharing! A 'vision board/poster' really keeps my attention on my intentions and provides clarity. My question today is, how often should this 'vision board/poster' be updated?

Kwesi C, thank you for this thought provoking question. Let us start off by exploring the fundamentals of goal setting.

For the purpose of this discourse allow me to make an illustration, by differentiating dreams and goals. In the context of building a career, a dream is something that you would like to achieve. It can be any kind of achievement, but the essence of a dream is the fact that you have a strong desire to see it come to pass. One such example; you would like to write a book one day. A goal on the other hand is something you would like to achieve by a certain time. To put it more succinctly, a goal is a dream with a time limit. Using the same example; by the end of next year you would like to have written a book. You see the difference, in the first case years can go by and your dream is still valid. But with a goal, if the end of next year is upon you and you have not yet written a single paragraph then you can be certain that you have failed miserably. But why is this important for us to understand?

Let me further explain by using another example: imagine you are about to go on a road trip. Your dream is to drive across the United States from New York to California and it does not matter to you how long it takes. Statistics show that this drive should take about two full days of direct driving to comfortably complete this journey. However, what would you do if an entire week has passed and you have still not arrived to California? Based on the original guidelines, nothing. You are destined to keep on driving and hopefully get there one day. This is what happens when we chase after a dream, we work and work and hope that one day we get there.

However let us revisit this same example in the context of a goal. You have a desire to drive from New York to California. The first thing you must to do is research by asking questions like: how long would the trip take? Based on that you can determine what route you take-- will it be the fastest or the more scenic route? Are there stops along the way that you must make? How much will the trip cost? These questions are just the beginning. What they help to do is provide checks and balances so that you can measure your progress along the way. For example, if the trip takes two days, by the end of day one you should be able to determine whether you are on course. If you decided to take the scenic route, and you have already passed two days it gives you an opportunity to re-plan. In response you can return to a more direct route and bypass any remaining stops that you intended on making.

You see, goals allow you to measure your progress, especially in terms of time. If the time has expired and your goal is not done, it forces you to re-plan. If you have completed on time or before schedule, then you move ahead and start planning the next goal. That said, your vision board must reflect the same.

You should revisit your vision board as often as required to ensure that your goals are accurately reflected. When goals have been achieved you can cross them off as completed. And as long as the remaining items things are still relevant then it can remain unchanged. My advice to someone whose goals are very dynamic (i.e. changes month by month) is that you can use a vision board that is equally as dynamic, like a dry erase board. The idea is to have something that you can put up and regularly update without diminishing its effectiveness.

As you may notice in the goal setting example above, the time factor forces you to implement checkpoints along the way. These checkpoints more readily facilitate regular adjustments to your plan, as opposed to waiting until you get too far off course to make those adjustments.

As I conclude today, be reminded that as long as those items on your vision board are still relevant, then there is no need to change. However, if things have changed so too must your vision board. So after reading both last week’s and today’s blog here is what you need to do:

1. Write down your goals

2. Look online for tips on how to create a vision board that suits you

3. Create a vision board (no need to get too fancy)

4. Tell a friend about this website and ask them to sign up for the mailing list by leaving a message on the “Contact Us” page

5. Share this and other postings from this site that you like on Twitter, Facebook and other social networking sites

6. Leave a comment or send a message to express how this blog has impacted you

7. Send me questions that you want answered and I will add them to a future posting

Until next time remember: as long as you have life you should live it to your fullest potential.

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Practical ways of becoming and remaining successful - having a vision

Today we are going to begin a series of blogs entitled, Practical Ways of Becoming or Remaining Successful. In this installment we will explore the topic of Having a Vision. I have been asked countless times by students and working professionals this question: How did I know what I wanted to be career-wise? The truth is, at least in my case, there were a number of iterations before I finally decided. Before I expand on this point any further let me define success. Success is simply: achieving a goal. On your march toward being successful, you will have to face numerous cycles of goal setting and achieving. This is why having a vision is important. Knowing where you want to ultimately be, will determine how many cycles are required in getting there.

Let’s get back to my story. My first career choice was to be a university professor. After that desire waned, I really wanted to become a medical doctor. But alas, that was also short-lived. As time went by and as I got a little more experience I became decided on a career within the Information Technology field. More specifically programming. You are probably wondering why so many changes? Well I have learned that in setting a vision for yourself you must do some sort of assessment as to what it will cost you to get there and then how well suited you are to that particular career. In my case, the fact that I ended up in Information Technology meant that I was pretty good at mathematics, problem solving and that I had a penchant for torture! All kidding aside, it is obvious that if you are not quantitative by nature you are probably not well suited for a career in Information Technology.

The assessments can be very deep, like future earning potential or job availability in your city or region. Or they can be really simple, like in my case with becoming a university professor. My parents were both teachers and I could not convince myself that a life of teaching was for me. Whatever the criteria, you must be sure that you do not set yourself up for failure by ignoring the warning signs. Apart from telling you what you are or are not well suited for, an assessment can also let you know how much work is required for you to attain your goal. For example, if you are not quantitative by nature and you want to pursue a career in Information Technology, you need to train and practice for as long as is required to develop this skill. This concept can be applied to any career.

In my book, How to Make it From the Classroom to the Cubicle, I used a very interesting analogy to stress the importance of setting goals and having a vision for yourself. I described a scenario where a pilot gives his customary post-take-off greeting to passengers over the plane’s PA system, stating that there is no destination. Imagine how terrified you would feel as a passenger on such a flight, knowing that a sensible pilot will go through all of the motions, including taking off, without having a final destination. Well unfortunately, this is exactly what we do when we embark on a career with no end goal in mind. Some people literally float from job to job with no real long-term plan. The result is the same as in the aforementioned flight. You can either fly around until there is no fuel left and crash, or you can make an emergency landing before a fuel crisis but end up miles off course.

So then, what do I suggest? Create a vision for yourself. I mean this in a very literal sense. As a first step, write down the things you want to achieve and when you would like to achieve them. In our house we have created a poster with everything we want to achieve and pinned it on the wall close to our bedside, so that every day we look at it we have a reason to get out of bed. Why is this important? Seeing where you are aspiring to be everyday can motivate you much more than just leaving thoughts floating around in your head. We get so busy or tired sometimes that we may forget why are doing what we are doing. But having that visual aide in plain sight every day helps build us up when we are down and discouraged. It also can help to suppress negative thoughts as we constantly fill our minds with images of our destination.

I will end with this. One pitfall you must avoid is chasing after the goals that someone else has set for you. This is very dangerous and can lead to a life filled with frustration and void of fulfillment. Another major pitfall is to sit idly by waiting for something big to happen. Nothing just happens when it comes to career building and if you are not proactive, then you reduce the probability of reaching your end goal.

Thank you for reading today’s blog, your feedback is very important to me so please leave comments below or submit any questions you would like answered by clicking here.

If you would like to get a copy of How to Make it From the Classroom to the Cubicle please click here.

Until next time remember: as long as you have life you should live it to your fullest potential.